Into the West, American Night
by pinkcat4569
Summary: Jess' next theme night has the men excited.  It's American night and they can't wait to barbecue.  The women are less confident in their cooking skills.
1. Chapter 1

Into the West, American Night in the ARC Canteen

by Pinkcat4569

Rating: T

Spoilers: Series 4, 5

Description: Jess' next theme night has the men excited. It's American night and they can't wait to barbecue. The women are less confident in their cooking skills.

Disclaimer: Don't own Primeval, the characters, the songs, or the dances.

Author's Note: The dinosaurs Bernie mentioned were from story "New Soldier," and they were sinovenators.

It's hard to write about your own country as if you know nothing. I'm not a barbecue fanatic, but I live in a major barbecue region. The following story is light-hearted, and as I like to say, not intended to educate or faithfully recreate. It's just a story, and as an American, if I'm not offended, hopefully no one else will be either.

5186 Words

Into the West, American Night

"Bernie and I were just discussing cuisine night," said Jess, holding a fresh cup of coffee.

Bernie Rice, the ARC's chef handed her a chocolate danish. "She wants to do America," he told the team.

"Barbecue!" cried the men.

"Real, American, over the coals, smoke in your face, flames leaping up, meat cooked hard as shoe leather barbecue!" cried Connor.

"I'm cooking," said Becker.

"Oh, no. I'm team leader, I get to barbecue," said Matt.

"I want to do it too," whined Connor.

The girls stared. "You're all crazy," said Abby.

Chef Bernie laughed. "Sorry, ladies, but there is something primal, deep in the genetic makeup of the male human that drives us to sear dead animal flesh over an open fire."

All the men grunted.

"I've grilled before," said Jess. "It's not necessarily a man thing."

"Yeah," said Abby. "Connor, what's the big deal? All we did in the Cretaceous was cook over an open fire."

"It's not the same. Nothing's trying to eat us for starters," said Connor.

"I too have cooked over fire," said Emily, "and I do not understand your excitement," she said to the men.

"Yeah, look at you all, you're like kids with a new toy," said Jess.

The men smiled.

"What would you like to cook?" asked Bernie.

"Everything, pork, chicken, beef, fish..." said Connor.

"Til it has a black, charred crust," Matt said proudly.

Becker giggled. "We need lots of wood chips, they use wood chips, don't they? Oh, and we need beer. Lots of beer."

"I think we should use a gas grill," said Matt. "They cook more evenly."

"Maybe, but we need lots of smoke. I want to do it like American tv, lots of smoke and flames," said Conno

"Yeah," agreed Becker. "Don't they slow cook stuff? Isn't that barbecue? Oh, and mothered in sauce. Served with beer. Oh, and I want to fry a turkey too."

Connor jumped up and down. "Oh my gosh, yes!" he cried excitedly, "in a great big vat of oil!"

"That's rather new," said the Chef. "It's kind of a fad in America, deep frying whole turkeys. They do lots of frying in American cuisine, especially in the South. Southern American cuisine is famous for fried chicken, sweet fruit fritters, savory vegetable fritters, greens, grits, and of course, donuts."

"I'm starting to like America," said Becker, with a grin. "We need beer."

"You said that already," said Jess, "several times, sweetie."

"I want to do this right, Jess," he said. "I need an Apron that says, "kiss the cook," a big oven mitt, sunglasses, a lawn chair, and a cooler of cold brewskies. I want to be American, at least for the evening."

Jess shook her head.

Becker smiled great big.

"Burgers and fries," said Abby. "That's what I think of when you say American food. The burgers should have the works, though, pickles, onions, ketchup and mustard, and maybe cheese and bacon."

"Bacon! OMG, Americans love bacon," said Connor. "I had this mate in college, from America, and he lived on bacon. That and root beer, peanut butter, and hot dogs."

"Gross!" cried Jess. "What is root beer, anyway?"

"I asked him once. He said it originally was made with roots of the sassafras tree. I had it once, its hard to describe. It's carbonated and sweet, but a definite acquired taste. I liked it."

"Hmm. I don't like peanut butter," said Abby. "I could eat a hot dog, though."

"We can skip any items you like," said Chef Bernie. "I thought I'd make American french fries, using fresh, real potatoes. I also thought I'd make fried chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy, grits, collard greens, and corn fritters, all representing the American south."

"Barbecue!" cried the men.

Bernie smiled. "It might interest you to know that the regions of America all cook barbecue slightly different. We could do regional dishes, then. The southern states tend to barbecue pork..."

"Yeah!" cried Matt.

"Although Texas likes to cook beef as well, particularly brisket..."

"Alright!" cried Becker.

"Then there is Chicago, up in the north, and they like to grill hot dogs and ribs."

"Sounds good!" cried Connor.

"And then, the central and Midwest states tend to cook everything. Kansas City is pretty famous for its barbecue, with lots of thick sauce."

Becker smiled. "I'm ready."

Bernie laughed. "There is on more thing about American barbecue. Don't ever get in between states, regions, and cities when they 'discuss' it."

Abby laughed. "They tend to fight?"

Bernie nodded, "Mostly its good natured. Everyone thinks there's is the best."

"We'll just have to settle it then," said Matt, the two other men nodding.

Bernie laughed. "Indeed. I promise we shall have barbecue."

The men cheered.

Bernie smiled and said, "How about we do some beef brisket, we can serve on sandwich rolls, and some traditional ribs. We'll also do barbecue chicken, sausage, and pork dishes. In addition, we can do some non-sauce recipes, where you are pretty much grilling—that is, over high heat, quickly, and without the barbecue sauce. We can make grilled salmon, grilled hot dogs, and the classic grilled burger."

"Yay," said Abby. "Burger and fries."

"I'll makes sure to have pickles, onions, and ketchup and mustard, Miss Maitland."

"Don't forget the cheese," she said.

"Or the bacon!" cried Connor.

"Sounds delicious," said Emily.

"Sounds like a lot," said Jess.

"Bernie?" asked Becker. "Beer."

"Of course, Captain, I shall get several American beers, and perhaps find some root beer, Mr. Temple."

"Cool!" said Connor.

Jess cleared her throat.

"Yes, Miss Parker?"

"Dessert."

Bernie smiled. "Classic American Chocolate Chip Cookies, traditional apple pie, and a summer favorite, strawberry shortcake, how do those sound?"

Jess smiled. "Very good. I understand that chocolate in the states isn't the same as it is here."

Bernie laughed. "No, it tends to be less sweet. I will arrange to have several bars and some assorted chocolates for you."

"Thank you, Bernie. You're a sweetheart."

Becker laughed. "You know, when he says 'you,' he expects you to share?"

Jess narrowed her eyes at him, and then at Bernie.

"There will be plenty, Miss Parker, and I will personally see to it that you get the first bite."

She smiled pleasantly at him, and stuck her tongue out at Becker.

"So what's the entertainment for American night, Jess?" asked Abby.

"Oh, hmm. I have to think on it."

"We could have movie night," said Abby. "Hollywood is the movie capital, and it's in America."

"Boring," said Jess.

"Movie costumes?" asked Connor.

"No..."

"Sing? We can do American Idol," offered Jess.

"Didn't they steal that from us?" asked Connor.

"I do not understand any of these words," said Emily.

Becker smirked. "How about a rodeo: horses, bulls, rodeo clowns, that's a job for you Connor."

"Funny, Action Man."

Jess' eyes twinkled.

"You're joking," said Matt, looking at her. "You're not going for it, are you? We can't have a rodeo."

"No, I am afraid not," said Bernie. "No animals in the canteen.

"There were dinosaurs in here once," said Becker.

"Do not remind me of that, Captain. I did not approve of them inside the canteen, either."

Becker laughed.

Jess said, "I wasn't thinking of a rodeo, but it did give me an idea, and I promise, Bernie, no animals, not real ones, anyway. Or live ones."

"Thank you," said the Chef.

"What's your idea, Jess?" asked Becker.

"You'll have to wait and see," said Jess.

End of Chapter One


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two, Into the West, American Night

A few days later, Becker walked into the hub.

"America night, Jess. Everything, ready?"

"Yes," said Jess. "I hope Lester is up to it."

"What?" asked Becker.

"He's helping with the entertainment. I hope he can do it."

"You could tell me, you know."

Jess smiled. "No, it's a surprise. So is your entertainment outfit."

"Excuse me?"

"Oh, you, and Abby, Em, Connor, and Matt are participating this time, and I've arranged for you to all be suitably dressed."

"You're going to make us participate in something, but you won't tell us what?"

"Right."

"I don't like it."

Jess laughed. "Trust me," she said, and to make him trust her, she got up from the ADD and kissed him tenderly. "You're in good hands."

Becker's eyebrow went up.

"Miss Parker! Get up here now! You got me into this, you can explain it. My god, it's another language!" shouted Lester.

"Later, sweetie," she said.

Jess was busy the rest of the day on canteen business. She spent an hour with Lester, helping him prepare, and then she decorated the canteen.

With the barbecue, and the southern dishes, and the secret entertainment, Jess decided to decorate the canteen like the American West. She had hay bales placed in the entrance, and she managed to find some old wagon wheels. She placed fake flowers with the wheels and put fake chickens with the hay bales. Maintenance carved some cow and buffalo silhouettes out of wood for her. She stuck them on the walls.

"Hey, babe," said Becker, as he, Matt, and Connor strolled in.

"Time to barbecue," said Connor.

"I can't wait to inhale some smoke," said Matt.

Jess followed them into the kitchen. "Are you sure about this? Bernie, how is your fire insurance?"

Bernie laughed. "My staff will be assisting them, Miss Parker. Don't worry, plus we have fresh batteries in all the fire alarms, and I am fully insured."

Jess sighed.

"Thanks for the faith, Jess," said Becker, putting on his apron.

Jess giggled. "Watch who you let read that apron," she said, doing as the apron said, and kissing him.

He smirked. "To the barbecue!"

"Where are you doing it at? Surely, not inside?"

"We're grilling inside on indoor grills, but the barbecues however, are set up in the car park," said Bernie.

She shook her head as she watched them, with several canteen workers exit the canteen, all carrying barbecue utensils, food, and supplies.

"Please don't get burned," she whispered.

"Here, this will help," said Bernie, giving her several American chocolate bars.

"It will! Thank you."

Jess tried an American snickers bar, with caramel, peanuts and chocolate. "Yum!"

She tried a Reese's peanut butter cup, peanut butter encased in a chocolate 'cup.' "Weird, but good."

She tried a plain Hershey's milk chocolate bar. "Not as sweet, but good."

Finally, she ate an American Three Musketeers, which was a chocolate covered nougat bar. "Delicious."

She went in to the kitchen to report to Bernie. "I have yet to meet a chocolate bar I don't like," she told him proudly. "Thank you."

Bernie smiled and laughed. "I'm glad you are less anxious."

Jess nodded. "I'd be even better if I could forget the guys are standing over flames as we speak."

"They handle prehistoric and future creatures daily, Miss Parker. I believe they'll be fine."

"I hope so, Bernie. I guess I'll get changed," she said.

She then went to change into her first American outfit. She wore a short denim skirt, a light blue cotton denim shirt, and topped the outfit off with a bright yellow cowboy hat and matching cowboy boots.

Becker strolled in carrying a black crusted piece of chicken.

"It's burnt!" she cried.

"It is not," he said, tersely. "It's perfect!"

Connor came in next with an equally black set or ribs, and right behind him came Matt, holding a plate of black sausages.

"They're inedible!" cried Jess

"You lot don't know what good is," said Connor.

"Really," said Becker. "This is man food."

"For extremely skinny, un-hungry men," said Jess.

The men scoffed.

Just then, Abby came in to the canteen.

"Abby, come over here and tell Jess how good the food looks," said Connor.

Abby wrinkled up her nose. "I have eaten worse, but I had no other choice," she said.

Jess giggled.

"Not the answer I wanted Abby," said Connor, offended.

"You're not making us eat those," said Abby. "I refuse."

"I don't think you girls are getting in the spirit, here," said Matt.

"I don't think you are," said Jess. "I doubt this is really American barbecue."

"Of course it is!" cried all three men.

Bernie hurried into the canteen dining room to see what the commotion was. He tried not to, but he could not keep from laughing when he saw the burned food.

"It's harder than it looks," he said simply.

"What? I think it's perfect," said Becker.

Jess shook her head. "Sorry, sweetie, but I'm not eating that."

"Fine. More for me."

"Yeah, since you girls don't know what's good," said Connor.

The boys took their platters and sat down, each one intending to eat their platters by themselves.

Bernie smiled and motioned for the ladies to come over to him.

"Some people do like their barbecue and grilled meat...well done. However, true barbecue must be slow cooked, so we have been working on some dishes that the men," he glanced at Becker, Connor, and Matt, "started this morning, and we have been watching for them."

"That's a relief," said Jess.

"Will they be edible?"

"Yes, Miss Maitland. I have sampled them and they are extraordinary."

The men scoffed.

"And you doubted us," said Becker, chewing on burned chicken.

"How can you eat that?" asked Jess.

"We told you," he said, "It's man food."

"It's ash," said Abby.

Matt grunted. "Women."

Connor agreed as they each ate their black meat.

"Yuck," said Abby.

Emily walked in carrying a platter of perfectly grilled salmon.

"Did you cook that?" asked Jess.

"I did. I thought the men were...over grilling."

The men snorted.

"It looks wonderful," said Abby.

"The canteen staff have other dishes, as well. They are not black," said Emily.

The girls chuckled.

The canteen staff that had left with the ARC team entered, each carrying a grilled, but not burned dish.

Bernie set out the other dishes, including the slow roasted, barbecued meats with sauce, the fried chicken, the mashed potatoes, fried okra, onion fritters, corn fritters, sweet apple fritters, and corn on the cob.

Abby cheered when Ryan brought out moist, perfectly charboiled hamburgers.

"That smells heavenly," said Abby.

"I have all the fixings, as you requested Miss Mailand," said Ryan, "as well as several cheeses, including an orange variety called American."

Connor ran over, "Bacon?" he asked.

Ryan smiled. "Yes, Connor, we fried lots of crsipy bacon."

"Yay," said Connor, making a cheese, bacon burger.

"It'll be better that that ash you were eating," said Abby, sinking her teeth into a hamburger. "Delicious."

"Very good," agreed Connor, chewing his burger too. "The barbecue WAS good too, though."

Abby shook her head.

"Mr. Temple?" asked Bernie, handing Connor a small brown bottle. "Your root beer, imported from the States."

"Cool!" He popped off the lid, and took a generous gulp. "Ah! That's the stuff."

Jess came over with a bottle too. "Here Connor. I don't like it," she said, giving him a near full bottle of root beer.

"Thanks," he said.

Jess said, "I'll stick to American chocolate. It wasn't bad."

Becker scoffed. "Have you ever met a chocolate you didn't like?"

"That's what I said to Bernie," she said. "You know me so well," she said, sitting beside her boyfriend.

"Sure you don't want some?" he asked, offering her black meat.

"No thank you. The fried chicken is more my taste. It's divine, Bernie."

"Thank you, Miss Parker. Enjoy dinner," he said, helping himself to a tall pile of slow barbecued pork, slathered with sauce. "It's been a while since I've had authentic American barbecue."

"Pace yourself, man," said Lester, sitting beside Bernie. He had a plastic bib on over his shirt and tie, his sleeves were rolled up and his face dripping with sauce. "Best ribs ever," he said. "I am quite content."

Bernie laughed at the sight of his barbecued boss. "Shall we toast to America?" he asked Lester, raising a beer bottle.

"Just this once," said Lester, clinking his bottle to Bernie's.

End of Chapter Two


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three, Into the West, American Night

After dinner and a quick clean-up, the tables were moved to make room for the surprise entertainment.

Jess and the team went off to get changed.

The rest of the ARC sat patiently, waiting for the entertainment. As they waited they heard seven voices crying, "Jess!"

Just outside the Canteen, eight people gathered. The smallest was happy, but the other seven were not.

"You can't be serious!" cried Matt.

"I am NOT wearing this in public. It's seriously uncool," said Abby.

"No way am I going into the canteen dressed like this!" cried Connor.

"I do not understand these clothes. They are very impractical, and this skirt is silly," said Emily.

"I love you, Jess, but no. Actually, hell no. Wait, make that no living way in hell, no," said Becker.

Sargent Nicole Bilson said, "If I had known that I would be wearing this outfit, I would not have agreed to help."

"Me too," said Lieutenant Vale. "I mean, I can usually make anything work, but this is way too much, even for me."

"I don't understand what's the problem," said Jess.

Lester stuck his head out of the canteen, saw them and laughed. "Very good. You look...smashing. Shall we get this square dance underway?"

All seven of Jess' companions asked at once, "Square dance?"

"Sure," said Jess. "Surprise!"

"That's why we look like neon, rhinestone studded cowboys," said Matt.

"Sissy cowboys, you mean," said Becker. "Real cowboys ride and shoot and are cool. They were leather and black. This..."

"What's wrong with it?" asked Jess.

Becker stared.

"I think you are as handsome as ever," she said, sliding inside his arms, kissing his cheeks and finally slowly kissing his lips.

"You're lucky you're cute," he said at last.

She smiled. "You'll do it, for me?"

He grunted and nodded.

"That's him," said Matt. "I'm not giving in."

Jess turned. "Please?"

One by one, all seven people fell for her puppy dog eyes and smiles.

Eventually the reluctant square dancers stood in front of the canteen audience. There were smirks and laughs, coughs, and snickers. There were also a few threats from Becker and Matt.

Jess stood in front. "Okay, this was a surprise for them, as well as all of you. So this first dance is to teach us all how to do the square dance. Lester will be the caller. He tells us what steps to perform. To teach us to do the steps please welcome Marie."

A pretty, dark haired woman, about 40, dressed in a bright orange square dancing skirt with a white puffy sleeve top, ran out.

"Good evening," she said. "It's my pleasure to teach you all the square dance."

She smiled happily and turned back to the dancers. She arranged them all in a square, two dancers, boy-girl, on each side: Becker, Jess; and Emily, Matt; and Abby, Connor; and finally, Vale and Bilson.

The girls wore gingham dresses, with puffed sleeves and wide skirts over white crinoline. They matched their partners' color. Each man wore long-sleeved western shirts, slick bright trousers, bolo (string tie) necklaces, cowboy hats and boots all in the same color and all studded with sparkly rhinestones.

Becker and Jess wore neon pink, much to Becker's dislike, Abby and Connor wore electric blue, Emily and Matt wore bright green, and Vale and Bilson wear in dazzling purple.

Jess smiled brightly, while everyone else grimaced. Soft but snappy country music played.

The dance teacher, Marie spoke, "Each couple has a number. The dancers with their backs to the music are couple one. Tonight, that is the pink couple, Jess and Becker."

Their were cheers and applause and smirks and snickers. Becker glared.

"Each dancer is standing beside a partner and on their other side, not too far away, another dancer. That dancer is called the corner. Let's start," said Marie.

"Ok, here we go," said Lester, "let's start with a do-se-do." He stood beside Marie, off from the dancers. He wore his suit coat now, and looked like his dapper self, except for the white cowboy hat trimmed with dark gray and a red feather.

Marie smiled and said, "Do-se-do: face your partners. Now, move around your partner, passing shoulders, without turning around, and with your arms crossed. Good."

The audience clapped. Jess was still the only dancer smiling.

"Allemande left," called Lester, trying out a horrendous cowboy drawl.

Marie said, "Allemande: face your corners, extend left arms, grab them, and move from person to person, grasping left arms. Now, back to your partner. Good job," she said, clapping.

"Next up," said Lester, "We'll swing your partner, here we go. Around and around with a do-se-do," he sang, tapping out a beat with his heel and dancing.

Marie was startled, but enjoyed his performance. "Let's start with swing your partner: Face your partner. Men put your left arm around her waist. Ladies, your arms go on their biceps, good. Now, clasp each other's free hand, and slowly twirl around. Good! Swing your partner!"

Jess giggled, and Becker had to smile. Emily seemed to enjoy the swing, and Matt didn't look like he could kill any more. Abby was still rigid, but Connor was getting into the swing.

"Now, we finish with a do-se-do," said Marie. The dancers remembered and passed around each other with folded arms. Marie exclaimed, "wonderful," and led the audience in clapping.

"Left hand Star," said Lester, getting into the spirit, again, he moved and stomped to the beat. "Don't stay where you are."

Marie laughed. "Are caller is ad-libbing again, and that is great! That is the spirit of the dance! Alright, dancers a left-hand star: Ladies, move into the middle, extend your left arms up, touching, and walk around in a circle. Good, now back to your partner, and do-si-do your partner."

"Really good job," said Marie. "Caller, if you don't mind, I'm going to call a right hand star: men."

"You all heard the little lady," said Cowboy Lester. "Right hand star for the men."

The men moved inside, right hands extended, touching, kind of, and moving in a circle. Becker, and Matt scowled, but Connor was shaking to the music, and Vale smiled at the ladies in the audience.

"Back to your partners," said Marie. "Excellent!"

The audience cheered.

Lester sang: "We're in the dance now, don't you fade, take your partner and promenade."

Becker and Jess looked at Lester.

"He's gone cowboy," Becker muttered as Jess giggled.

Marie laughed at Lester, than got back to business, "Promenade your partner: shake hands with your partner but don't let go. Ladies step with your right foot toward the men. Men take your arms and spin her under, stop. Now your arms are crossed in front of each other. Hold them like that and promenade that is, walk around, all of you, in a circle."

"I...we have a problem," said Sargent Bilson.

"Yeah, we're stuck."

Vale and Bilson had somehow managed to twist their arms back wards.

"Ow, OK," said Bilson. "We're fine, now."

"Move," said Matt, running into Bilson and Vale.

"I am sorry, Nicole," said Emily.

"It's fine. We're the one causing a traffic jam."

"Give us a moment," said Vale.

Eventually, they all moved in the circle and ended in their start positions.

The audience and Marie chuckled.

"It is harder than it looks," said Marie.

"I'm glad I'm not dancing," said Lester, still kicking up his heels, and dancing in place.

"Yeah, good thing," commented Connor with a chuckle.

Becker grunted.

"Oh, bother," said Lester, dropping his cheat notes.

Marie laughed. "That's alright," she said. "I'll call. Let's circle right. Everyone, join hands, good, and walk slowly in a circle, to your right.. Excellent. Let's give our beginners a hand!"

"Allemand left," Marie said, "This means to face your corner, remember, its the person who isn't your partner. Good. Extend arms, grasp hands, keep going to the next person, crossing arms. Good Back to your partner, and do-se-do your partner. Excellent."

"Are we done yet?" asked Matt, grumpily.

Becker grunted.

Jess sighed. "I think that's enough, Marie."

Marie smiled. "OK, Everyone, circle right. Good, one last swing your partner. Excellent. Now, men, bow to your partner, and ladies' curtsey. Good! Let's give them a hand! They were brilliant!"

"Are we done already?" asked Connor.

Matt glared at him, and Becker grunted.

"Thank you," said Jess to them all. She kissed Becker.

The audience hooped and hollered.

Then Becker ran out, followed closely by Matt.

Jess shook her head. "I liked the outfits"

Marie laughed. "They aren't for everyone," she said.

"I don't know. It appears I can rock anything," said Vale, smiling at some pretty women in the audience.

Nicole Bilson rolled her eyes. "I better sit with you and chaperone," she said.

Vale smiled his enchanting smile and sat in a crowd of giggling, blushing women. Bilson sat above him, chaperoning.

Jess laughed. Still standing up front, she said to the crowd, "How about a hand for Marie?"

They clapped and hollered.

"Thank you," said Jess, "now for some real square dancing, please welcome the Marie Studio Dancers!"

Marie was joined by a man matching her in orange, and other pairs of brightly colored, matching couples. The music played loudly, and they square danced.

Emily and Abby sat in the audience, Connor standing beside them, next to Lester. They both stomped and clapped to the music.

Jess stood by the Canteen entrance. Soon, Matt and Becker appeared in their normal clothing.

"You ever do that to me again," said Matt to Jess, "and I'll hurt you."

"No you won't," she said with a smile.

He frowned. "I'll eat your chocolate."

Becker laughed. "That'll do it," he said.

Jess looked pained. "I apologize for torturing you," she said. "However, Emily seemed to enjoy it."

"Which is why you still have chocolate left to eat," he said with a smirk and went to sit with Emily.

Jess looked at Becker. "Where's your threat?"

"You'll get it...later," he said with a smirk.

She laughed. "I thought it was fun."

"Maybe with an audience. Or without rhinestoned girly trousers," he said.

She smiled.

Becker took her in his arms, and they watched the square dance.

"You know, they aren't bad," he said.

"See?"

"What? Jess, they know what they're doing. We were clueless and surprised," said Becker.

"I'm sorry." She smirked, and leaned up kissing him long and tenderly. "Still angry with me?" she asked.

"Yes, but do that again," he said.

She laughed, and kissed him again.

The audience clapped, and the dancers bowed, curtsied and left the 'stage.'

End of Chapter Three


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four, Into the West, American Night, conclusion

Bernie stood in front. "We are coming to the end of American night. Join us for 'a night cap.' Usually, it means something alcoholic, but since it would be irresponsible to turn you loose drunk, again," said Bernie with a cough, "we are serving hot chocolate, several American coffee drinks, and hot cider. None of which are strictly American, but we do what we can. Also, have some dessert, we have apple and cherry pies, chocolate cake, and a summer favorite, strawberry shortcake."

Jess was first in line for the chocolate cake. "I'm also having hot chocolate."

"That's too much chocolate," said Abby.

"There's no such thing."

Becker laughed, shoveling strawberry shortcake into his mouth. "I like this. What's in it?"

Bernie smiled. "I thought you might like that one, Captain. It is a sponge cake, topped with lightly sugared strawberry slices, and topped with fresh whipped cream."

"Mm, mm," said Becker.

"Thank you for the compliment," said Bernie. Becker smiled.

"The apple pie is good too, Bernie."

"Thank you Mr. Anderson," he said, then turning to Jess, he spoke to her. "It would seem to be another successful night, Miss Parker."

Jess didn't hear. She was intently eating her chocolate.

"Miss Parker?"

Becker chuckled. "Sorry, Bernie. She's in the chocolate zone. It happens. You just have to wait til it wears off."

Bernie laughed. "Take care of her."

"Will do," he said. He turned to Jess and playfully smeared whipped cream on her nose. She didn't notice.

Abby laughed, and leaned across the table to wipe it off her. Jess was still engrossed in eating and still didn't notice.

"Wow, she is gone," said Abby.

Becker nodded and smiled. "It's weird, right?"

Abby laughed. "How long til she snaps out of it?"

"Usually as soon as she's out of chocolate," he said.

They were interrupted by singing. "Like a rhinestone cowboy..."

"Lester?" asked Matt. "Are you OK?"

"Fine, Anderson. I have a new understanding and affection for our cousins across the pond," he said, switching songs. "Got to know when to hold them, know when to fold them, know when to walk away, know when to run..."

"What song is that?" asked Connor.

Everyone shrugged.

Marie came over. "It's "The Gambler," from Kenny Rogers, a popular and famous country-Western, American singer."

"You sure know a lot about American West traditions," said Abby.

"I lived in America as a child, and moved back when my husband was transferred there. I guess I just have a strong love for America," she said. "Even though I love it here, in my home country too."

"Lester's gone bonkers for it, it seems," said Becker.

Marie smiled. "I asked him if he'd like to join our square-dance club."

"What was his reply?" asked Emily.

"He said he was frightfully busy or he'd be happy to. I don't think he could stomach the costumes," she said with a smile.

Matt and Becker grunted in understanding.

"I kind of like them," said Connor. "Want to join, Abby?"

"No thank you, Connor."

"Join what?" asked Jess, putting down her spotless, licked clean dish.

"She lives!" cried Becker. "You did that weird chocolate thing again, Jess."

"I did not. I don't go into some kind of trance when I eat chocolate, Becker. I'd wish you'd stop saying that."

Abby laughed. "Uh, yes, you do, Jess. We all witnessed it."

Jess blushed. "What were you all talking about?"

"Joining a square-dance club," said Connor.

Becker frowned and covered his ears.

Jess then squealed loudly.

"No," he said.

"Come on. It will be fun," begged Jess.

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

Jess pouted.

"I danced in public, Jess, looking like a Hello Kitty cowboy. I think I've given into you enough," he said.

"Fine, I guess," she said. "Thank you, by the way."

He smiled. "You're welcome, but you have a problem."

"What?" asked Jess.

Becker smirked and pointed. "That," he said.

Jess followed his finger and saw Lester, dancing around by himself singing. "Oh, suzanna, don't you cry for me...I come from Alabama with a banjo on my knee..."

"How does he know all these songs?" asked Abby.

Jess shook her head. "I don't know."

Marie looked guilty. "My fault. I gave him some of our music books."

Lester sang another random lyric, "Mama, don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys..."

"Congratulations, Jess, you've turned Lester into a closet cowboy," said Becker.

Jess winced. "Oops."

Bernie shook his head. "I do enjoy these theme nights, but I swear that they are getting stranger."

Everyone laughed and nodded.

Lester had switched songs again. "Save a horse...ride a cowboy."

"Lester!" screamed Jess, blushing. "I'm so, so sorry, everyone. He doesn't know what he's singing."

"And that is the end of American Night," said Bernie. "Good night, everyone."

"So long, little dogies," said Lester. "Time to vamoose, and ride off in the sunset."

"Very strange," said Bernie.

The End


End file.
